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Rev. Betty Hurley

Interfaith/Interspiritual Minister

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  • End of Life

    End-of Life Resources

    The End of Life Doula- Who, Why, When?

     

    Although over 70% of Americans say they would prefer to die at home, over 70% of Americans die in the hospital, often in the ICU Unit. There are many reasons why so many have their last moments where they did not wish to be, but one is often our reluctance to approach the topic of death with family and friends.

     

    An End of Life Doula can help facilitate those conversations. Knowledgeable about options in the area for those facing medical challenges, they can work with the patient and their family and friends to identify the best option for their situation. And End of Life Doula can also assist the family with identifying and completing a legacy project- perhaps a photo album or a music collection or collage. And, if wanted, a plan for the final days can be written down so family and friends know what is desired even if the patient becomes unable to communicate wishes.

     

    After a death, the End of Life Doula continues to work with family and friends as they grieve.

     

    You may have heard of a Birth Doula, someone who contracts with an expecting couple to assist through the pregnancy and birthing process. Henry Fersko-Weiss, Executive Director of the International End of Life Doula Association and creator of the term, End of Life Doula, built his model on that of the Birth Doula. He even took their training to gain ideas for how to train an End of Life Doula.

     

    The role of End of Life Doula is still quite new. Training programs are increasing. They include training from the International End of Life Doula Association (INELDA), which also maintains a director of End of Life Doulas. The University of Vermont has a certificate program, available fully online.

     

    For further information, check out some of these resources:

     

    The International End of Life Doula Organization (includes resources and directory):

    https://www.inelda.org/

     

    End of Life Doula Training through Lifespan (includes resources):

    https://www.lifespandoulas.com/end-of-life-doula-training/

     

    AARP article about End of Life Doulas:

    https://www.aarp.org/caregiving/home-care/info-2018/end-of-life-doulas.html

     

    Huffpost article about End of Life Doulas:

    https://www.huffpost.com/entry/end-of-life-doulas_n_591cbce2e4b03b485cae51c2?guccounter=1&guce_referrer=aHR0cHM6Ly93d3cuZ29vZ2xlLmNvbS8&guce_referrer_sig=AQAAAHasKd5g0TTlw1pY11Wmsa9AV_Xc9lSddevX8NHKBSBBUpy1ga7rKjoauy_cKlLT0DidJpuosYGTmVWFzKws6aulB7-pnyB1-EO-eyFxXOvSBcO7YjfMX7I5eVRHUflHkALTwFMCiv11G41sEA6tgT_XaKcJYyI-DtdWIOUT9sjI

     

    This resource is not specifically for end-of-life, but is a resource to provide educational support resources for patients, survivors, and loved ones who are challenged with a Mesothelioma diagnosis. Navigating a new cancer diagnosis can be incredibly overwhelming. Their experienced patient advocacy team is dedicated to walking patients through the treatment options available, connecting them with top doctors, and answering any questions.

     https://www.mesotheliomahope.com/

    Companion Pet End-of-Life Doula

    Check out these resources:

     

    Organizations

     

    Association for Pet Loss Bereavement- has a chat room; list of support chaplains; support groups; resources

    https://www.aplb.org/

     

    International Association for Animal Hospice and Palliative Care (IAAHPC)

    https://iaahpc.org/

     

    Mission: The IAAHPC promotes comfort care that addresses the physical, psychological, and social needs of animals with chronic and/or life-limiting diseases. We promote physical, emotional, and spiritual support for caregivers. We also educate professionals and advance research in the field of animal hospice and palliative care.

     

    Virtual Pet Cemetery

    https://www.virtualpetcemetery.org/pet/index.html

     

    This site accepts pet photos and epitaphs.

     

    Pet Loss Hotlines

     

    Article from veterinarypartner.com about pet loss hotlines

     

    https://veterinarypartner.vin.com/default.aspx?pid=19239&catId=102895&id=6048075&ind=1560&objTypeID=1007

     

    Cornell Pet Loss Hotline

     

    https://www.vet.cornell.edu/about-us/outreach/pet-loss-support-hotline

     

    Tufts University Pet Support Hotline

     

    https://vet.tufts.edu/petloss/

     

    University of Illinois College of Veterinary Medicine Companion Animal Related Emotions (CARE) Pet Loss Helpline

     

    http://vetmed.illinois.edu/animal-care/

     

    Toll-free hotline: 877-394-2273

    Availability: Wednesday afternoons, 1:00-5:00 pm

    Notes: We will return calls within 24 hours if you leave a message outside of those hours.

     

    ASPCA Pet Loss Hotline
    877-GRIEF-10 (toll free)

     

    Pet Loss Support Groups

     

    I could not find anything in the county I am moving to. The closest pet loss support group is in Ithaca, New York.

     

    Pet Loss Support Group

     

    https://cathiesimpson.com/

     

    Cathie Simpson, Ithaca NY

     

    Online Pet Loss Support

     

    http://www.lightning-strike.com/index.htm

     

    Facebook Support Groups

     

    https://www.facebook.com/groups/petlosssupportdianapalm

     

    Pet Psychologist- Dr. Katie Lawlor- online support groups along with FB page

     

    https://www.facebook.com/petlosspsychologist

     

    Virtual Support Group- Russell Elleven

    If this is helpful at all, please consider letting your clients know of my monthly virtual (zoom) support group for animal companion loss. Folks who are anticipating the death of a companion are certainly welcome too. The meeting is held on the first Wednesday of the month (Oct 7th upcoming) at 8:00 pm (ET). Participants just need to email me (relleven@gmail.com) and I'll get the login info to them. There is no fee charged for attending.

    Books

    Goodbye, Friend: Healing Wisdom for Anyone Who Has Ever Lost a Pet
    by Gary Kowalski

    Losing My Best Friend: Thoughtful support for those affected by dog bereavement or pet loss
    by Jeannie Wycherley

    The Last Will and Testament of an Extremely Distinguished Dog
    by Eugene O'Neill (written for his wife on the loss of their Dalmatian)

    When Your Pet Dies: A Guide to Mourning, Remembering and Healing
    by Alan D. Wolfelt PhD

    Going Home: Finding Peace When Pets Die
    by Jon Katz

    Animal Reiki ~ using energy to heal the animals in your life. By Elizabeth Fulton and Kathleen Prasad- from Susan Haces

     

    Counseling Skills for Companioning the Mourner by Alan Wolfeit- from Susan Haces

    Jasper's Day [about a dog's last day]

    https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1366504.Jasper_s_Day

     

    Other Resources. (online)

     

    Resources from Cornell Vet Hospital:

     

    https://www.vet.cornell.edu/about-us/outreach/pet-loss-support-hotline/resources-grieving/other-web-sites-interest

     

    Resources from University of Florida Vet Hospital:

     

    https://smallanimal.vethospital.ufl.edu/resources/pet-loss-support/

     

    Pet Library (can search by keywords or by letter)

     

    https://www.senecafallsvet.com/pet-library.pml

     

    VetVine- online resource for vets and pet owners (hosts online pet loss support groups)

     

    https://www.vetvine.com

     

    End-of-Life Toolkit (from Module 2 of course)

     

    https://www.aaha.org/globalassets/02-guidelines/end-of-life-care/End-of-Life-Toolkit

     

    Recommended Website (from classmate Robin Scov)

    This site contains pet loss support groups and many other resources.

     

    https://www.animalsinourhearts.com/

     

    Pet Chaplain Site- possible model for end-of-life doula site?

     

    https://allcreaturesministry.weebly.com/

     

    Song

     

    Beyond The Rainbow Bridge (PET LOSS SONG) - Trina Belamide

     

    Animal Reiki

     

    What is animal reiki and how it complements our doula practice                                                

    Animal Storygram and how being a safe space in the present moment can be healing for both us and the animals

     

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